Can Failure be an Option?

Over the past several years, I've attended many conferences and workshops where speakers have talked about how all kids can learn and the importance of that belief. They also talk about how, if that's true, it's our obligation and duty as teachers to make sure all students learn and have success. This famous clip serves as the mantra for many schools and districts determined to see students succeed. 

Okay, I get that. We all love kids and want them to succeed. If fact we want to design systems where no child is "left behind" and no child fails. Full proof schools where everyone is a winner. They unintentionally paint pictures of kids "not getting away with not doing their work". These are not places of joy but places where come hell or high water, kids will succeed and if they fail, it's the teacher's or the school's fault. What if it is the kid's fault? Can they ever choose not to be successful? Should a 5 year old even be considered a failure? Should a 17 year old be allowed to fail? How do we create a gradual release of control or do we ever relinquish that control? The other huge misconception that is rarely explored under this philosophy is that all children, while they are capable of learning, aren't all capable of learning the same thing at the same time in the same way. 

On the other hand we hear other folks talking about student's owning the learning, customized and personalizing learning for every child. I subscribe to that belief and I'm not suggesting these two ideas are mutually exclusive but I wonder about the value of failure. We're also hearing many talk about embracing failure. Is that simply as adults? Can students learn to embrace failure? Not just in terms of  risk taking but of  not achieving. I'm talking more about 15 year and 16 year olds who drop out of school. Is our goal to  make schools where 15 and 16 year olds want to stay? What if there is a better option for them like working?  Maybe there are 15 and 16 year olds who aren't having their needs met. Some suggest not all kids need to go to college, but do they all need to finish high school? Schools, as much as they try can't be all things to all students. Particularly as we are currently a million miles for making school the personal and project based places many dream of. Our schools today by in large, for better or worse, have mandated curriculum that determines what is and isn't important for life. Even when teachers begin to make learning more meaningful and personal, school still consists of arbitrary learning goals. What happens when a student decides he/she isn't interested? At what age is it appropriate for a student to make a different choice of how to spend their day? As well, what ways to we invite and make it easy for students to re-enter school as adults? I had a friend who dropped out at 15 and returned to school at 18 and outside of the stigma attached to being 18 years old in high school, it was a good move for him. 

I've seen lots of talk about reducing the dropout rate. What I continue to see is a focus on changing the supports for these students and little in the way of making school in general a place that doesn't suck. But really my question continues to be, if we believe (maybe you don't) that the kids should own the learning, shouldn't they own the failure too? I'm not suggesting we simply create a smorgasbord of learning and then watch them sink or swim but I've witnessed educators spending countless hours hand holding and walking students through painful exercises designed to help them 'get through" the curriculum. Reminds me of parents who do their child's homework. 

In some ways this returns me to a previous post about personalization and standardization. I don't have many answers and am really inviting some conversations, help me see what I may be missing but I"m frustrated with both the "no kid can fail" attitudes and the "kids own the learning but not the failure" thinking too.

The only thing I can think of that helps me work through these ideas is my own parenting. I obviously want my kids to succeed and yet they've all experienced some failure. My kids have all started into sports and music programs they decided they didn't like and quit. Sometimes we made them persevere and on occasion they discovered they liked it. As parents, we felt all our kids needed a basic proficiency in swimming and music. They didn't have a choice. Some of them choose to go beyond the basics, others met the basic, then quit.  As they got older they chose they own paths. Altogether my kids have quit/failed at many things. Big deal. None of these endeavors, like school are on the same level as Apollo 13. It's not life and death. I'm not suggesting it doesn't matter but whether or not a student passes algebra shouldn't carry the weight if often does. I'm sure others will disagree. Feel free. 

Alright, I've been all over the map here, not my best writing but I hope I've started a few ideas we might talk about together. Should kids be allowed to fail? Under what circumstances? Go. 

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